Same same same! I don’t have social media on my phone and I still turn to it for no reason all the time. Something I’m trying is to say out loud the reason why I am picking up my phone--mostly so I don’t forget in the split second between having a thought to do something on my phone and getting lost in the internet ether.
So relatable! Love the idea of looking for messages inside instead of outside. I think I look for messages because I’m very motivated by avoiding boredom at all costs and also to connect. And yet I don’t get bored easily since when I am quiet or looking inside, there is always something there. But for some reason I maybe don’t believe there will be. And also i think I’m monkey brain trained that looking at my phone will give me connection. So I just need to switch my “belief” system -- there is something there inside and not something there in my phone. Easy cheesy 😂
I think actively seeking boredom is so important! It shows your creativity that you are willing to listen. Let yourself be bored! THAT SAID, I sometimes forget and am pingponging all over the place before I remember that it's ok to be uncomfortable in the stillness.
So true Julie! I’m listening to Cal Newport’s Digital Minimalism on audiobook at the moment. And he talks about a lot of the same stuff in regards social media. And you are right— they do do it on purpose. The goal is for us to constantly want to be ‘connected’ through their app in this digital world— but it has been proven to have many, many negative effects on us! He offers lots of advice on how to become a digital minimalist, most of which I already do, as I just frankly, don’t have very many online friends, and don’t get any joy, really, out of posting and scrolling to instagram as I once did. Basically he says to turn off notifications, and set aside times for checking our email/apps, etc. And now that I think about it, you might have already mentioned this book, which is how I have come to read it! In any case, check it out if you haven’t!
Yes, Digital Minimalism was HUGE for me in getting off social media. Especially his idea that, because it's designed to suck us in, we really need to have a list of things we'd rather be doing. That deciding "I'm going to be on social media less" isn't enough.
It’s amazing that you’ve realized what you really want when you feel compelled to look at your phone and I love your insights about this behavior and about the validity of your inner messages. It’s helping me think about what I’m really looking for, not just avoiding (boredom, my negative thoughts) when I check my phone.💗
I will say that it has taken me a few years to really get to this point. You might get there faster! But don't be hard on yourself if you still reach for your phone more than you want to. It has been a series of gradual shifts for me. And there are more shifts needed still.
Great video, blog, and comments. I don't get social media on my cell phone. I never downloaded the Substack app either. I don't have the problem with my cell, but it's when I sit down to my computer each morning, the glutton goes from one new shiny something to something else. It's like a hunter gatherer without any blood or indigestion. However, your key takeaways here I've jotted down.
Regarding the inner voice, there is a language that I've listened to and diarized since I was 12. It always realigns me. It has allowed me to get back to myself easily. As a result, there is a whole language with my previously passed brother and parents, even other family members who were important in my youth.
This classroom on earth provides so much for us. As long as I'm not beating myself up, but focusing on the wonder and also the strongest voice within, other than the incessant critic, I'm in awe of my day and my life.
I absolutely loved this video; the rain, the greenery, the dedication you had to get this very deep and important point across. Glad I found it and you!
I will say I recently turned off emails for Substack, so I can only see new posts when I actively choose to go into the app, and that has been nice for not feeling quite so overwhelmed with messages nagging at me to open and read them.
Same same same! I don’t have social media on my phone and I still turn to it for no reason all the time. Something I’m trying is to say out loud the reason why I am picking up my phone--mostly so I don’t forget in the split second between having a thought to do something on my phone and getting lost in the internet ether.
Oooo, saying out loud why you're picking up your phone is such a good tip!
So relatable! Love the idea of looking for messages inside instead of outside. I think I look for messages because I’m very motivated by avoiding boredom at all costs and also to connect. And yet I don’t get bored easily since when I am quiet or looking inside, there is always something there. But for some reason I maybe don’t believe there will be. And also i think I’m monkey brain trained that looking at my phone will give me connection. So I just need to switch my “belief” system -- there is something there inside and not something there in my phone. Easy cheesy 😂
I think actively seeking boredom is so important! It shows your creativity that you are willing to listen. Let yourself be bored! THAT SAID, I sometimes forget and am pingponging all over the place before I remember that it's ok to be uncomfortable in the stillness.
Yes, totally agree; all my creativity comes from boredom! So grateful for it.
So true Julie! I’m listening to Cal Newport’s Digital Minimalism on audiobook at the moment. And he talks about a lot of the same stuff in regards social media. And you are right— they do do it on purpose. The goal is for us to constantly want to be ‘connected’ through their app in this digital world— but it has been proven to have many, many negative effects on us! He offers lots of advice on how to become a digital minimalist, most of which I already do, as I just frankly, don’t have very many online friends, and don’t get any joy, really, out of posting and scrolling to instagram as I once did. Basically he says to turn off notifications, and set aside times for checking our email/apps, etc. And now that I think about it, you might have already mentioned this book, which is how I have come to read it! In any case, check it out if you haven’t!
Yes, Digital Minimalism was HUGE for me in getting off social media. Especially his idea that, because it's designed to suck us in, we really need to have a list of things we'd rather be doing. That deciding "I'm going to be on social media less" isn't enough.
It’s amazing that you’ve realized what you really want when you feel compelled to look at your phone and I love your insights about this behavior and about the validity of your inner messages. It’s helping me think about what I’m really looking for, not just avoiding (boredom, my negative thoughts) when I check my phone.💗
I will say that it has taken me a few years to really get to this point. You might get there faster! But don't be hard on yourself if you still reach for your phone more than you want to. It has been a series of gradual shifts for me. And there are more shifts needed still.
Great video, blog, and comments. I don't get social media on my cell phone. I never downloaded the Substack app either. I don't have the problem with my cell, but it's when I sit down to my computer each morning, the glutton goes from one new shiny something to something else. It's like a hunter gatherer without any blood or indigestion. However, your key takeaways here I've jotted down.
Regarding the inner voice, there is a language that I've listened to and diarized since I was 12. It always realigns me. It has allowed me to get back to myself easily. As a result, there is a whole language with my previously passed brother and parents, even other family members who were important in my youth.
This classroom on earth provides so much for us. As long as I'm not beating myself up, but focusing on the wonder and also the strongest voice within, other than the incessant critic, I'm in awe of my day and my life.
I absolutely loved this video; the rain, the greenery, the dedication you had to get this very deep and important point across. Glad I found it and you!
Thank you for this sweet message, Barbara!
I will say I recently turned off emails for Substack, so I can only see new posts when I actively choose to go into the app, and that has been nice for not feeling quite so overwhelmed with messages nagging at me to open and read them.