This video is for me. (And you!)
We’re all different. (Like the Peter Spier book I mention in the video says.) You’re supposed to want different things than other people, because we’re all different from each other. Listen to your inner voice. Don’t worry so much about making sure everyone thinks you’re nice. Be nice to you! Put yourself first. It’s not selfish, it’s living.
You have my permission to follow the actions of that little voice inside you, even if it makes you do something that everyone else thinks is weird. Make your own yogurt, paint a mural in your living room, learn how to do a headstand, take more naps.1 Whatever it is, if your first thought is, “YES!” then do it. And if your first thought is “oh, NO THANK YOU” then say no.
Another example: I’m going through one of those phases where I can’t figure out what book I want to read. I have piles and piles of books, and none of them is quite the right one. This week I started three different books, books that were all highly recommended, and I tried to read them, but it became clear, when I noticed how I felt, that none of them were the book I wanted to be reading right now. So I’m not going to! You don’t have to stick with a book that isn’t right for you (even if you know you might like it at some other point in your life). You don’t have to stick with a book because someone took the time to write it, or because someone else you trust liked it a lot. “This is not right for me right now” is more than enough of a reason not to do something.
I have gotten so much better at trusting myself, and still often I will be halfway into something and realize that it’s not what I want to do at all. Or I’ll have to try something, because I can’t tell yet whether I’ll actually like it. You’re not some magical sage who lives high on a hill and knows all the answers. Sometimes you have to get your hands dirty (actually or metaphorically) to know the answer. Try the thing! Play around! And, when you can, get quiet2 and listen. So many of the best decisions I made came from following the answers I got when I really took the time to hear the wisdom that was already deep inside me.
For the record, none of these things is weird.
My most reliable methods for getting quiet and hearing my intuition: going for a walk, journaling, meditating, talking to myself while driving alone. But there are 1000 ways to do it.
trusting in you